It has been 8 months since I have been on track for the healthy part of this blog…. the hiking has finally started to suffer as a result. I am not sure how it happened other than me consciously deciding to not be healthy. For about half that time, I have managed to ignore how far off the rails I have gone.
Not only have I been struggling with being healthy I have been less than forthcoming about my struggles as if they will just disappear. And not just with you but with everyone in my life.
So this is my confession, I have fallen far off the healthy bandwagon. I have been way outside my daily calorie intake. I have had a considerable cut back on my exercising. I have been eating my emotions.
I have been trying hard to find inspiration, the last few hikes we have done I was sweaty, overheated and strangely struggling with my breath. I know I have gained back weight but I am not sure how much at this point as I have been avoiding scales for months.
I have to find balance again in my life in terms of how to control my bad eating habits. I have been trying to figure out where is the best place to start ….again.
I am confessing here because I can’t pretend it is not happening anymore I need to be up front about it all. I am going to get back to my Lose It! app and tracking my daily calories in and out. I am also going to venture to get rid of my cheat day which sadly turned into my cheat 3 days….I apparently can no longer be at home without a guardian or having my hands tied behind my back to avoid shoveling food in my face.
I have been going to some of my favorite blogs for motivation, but I have to tell you Nancy over at My year of Sweat always makes me think through my issues a little more in-depth then I am normally willing to do because she is so good at identifying all of her issues, stumbling points and triumphs. Over the last year she has become my “live a better life” superhero. If you don’t know Nancy, please check out her blog it is awesome -> just like her!!!
I am still hiking every weekend and I have been getting in as many days as I can, I have 2 new hikes I need to write-up that I did weeks ago and of course I have done a bunch of repeaters.
The rest of my summer I am going to focus on getting get back into the shape I was last fall. I really want to do Grays and Torreys (14ers) before the summer ends. I still want to try to backpack, but to be honest I may not get to it until next summer.
I will start listing my weigh-ins again weekly.
Thanks for being patient with me and thanks for helping me get back on the healthy track.
Now get out there and hike, I know I will be hiking this weekend!
hiking to healthy 
I feel your struggles. I can totally imagine what a drug addict goes through because food is my drug. When you said you need a guardian at home, I know that feeling. I have to ask my husband to put the food away after a meal because I can’t be trusted not to eat it when trying to put it away. 😦 You sound like a strong woman, physically & mentally, I know you can do this…and I will check out Nancy’s blog. Thanks!
That is it exactly, I am totally an addict. I have found myself in a grocery store parking lot more time then I like to admit for no other reason then to stock up on Cheetos…. Check to Nancy you will love her! Thank you so much for your support, it means the world to me! Hope you are safe with all the fires your way.
Hey, if you want help or support, I’ll be here. I love to hike and live in Franktown. If you want to hike Castlewood Canyon, stop by and we’ll do it together. I need to loose 20lbs, yes, I know that sounds feeble, but it’s still hard. Food is an addiction, and finding time to exercise is TOUGH! I work full time and I’m a writer so I time is in short supply. Don’t give up, ever!
Thank you so much Sandra! I love Castlewood, we need to meet up and share its beauty together. 20lbs is still tough to me so I hear ya!
Any time, I’m here and I love to hike.
Don’t be hard on yourself. Everybody, and I really mean everybody, goes through this! xo
Thanks Laurel! I know… it just sucks….. but I am committed!
Don’t beat yourself up just re-focus on what you want and make the plans to get there. I know you can do it! Plus there’s so many great hikes to be had in CO you gotta stay healthy so that you can view all of them! We did Mt Audubon last weekend. It was great!
Ohh I have been thinking about Audubon for a while! I need to get there soon!
So glad to hear from you. I missed your blogs.
Struggling with an addiction is hard. I remember listening to the response of a man whom I admire greatly, when asked how he gave up smoking: “One day at a time, one hour at a time.” It must be exhausting. He said that he had given up smoking many times, but that he fell off the wagon frequently. Then he’d forgive himself, and give it up again. Finally, he was able to quit entirely.
Forgive yourself.
And begin again.
Thank you so much, it is great advice.
What a brave post! Sending good thoughts and vibes your way.
Thank you! I need all the good vibes I can get!
You are so brave! I wish I lived in Colorado so we could hike together! Maybe someday we could plan a girls backpack trip!
That would be great Ruthi!
Okay, first off, do you even realize how totally brave and amazing you are for writing this? No one ever had to know that you’ve been struggling. You put it out there. You are strong and courageous. And you will do this, Kathy.
If you EVER need to talk, please email me. I’ll email you to make sure you have got my email address (but I’m pretty sure you can find it in your WP admin area – where the comments are). We can even chat on the phone of Skype or whatever, if you ever just want to vent. I totally get that. Believe me.
Next, it has been decided. We MUST meet up and hike together. I am dying to learn from you. You are a pro. I still refer to scrambles as “that jumble of rocks”, and had no idea what breaking a trail was until I read it in one of your winter posts and had to look it up. 🙂 (In fact, now that I think about it, I may even be saying it wrong. Cutting a trail?? LOL)
Lastly, thank you so much for your kind words. You, and so many others I’ve met online, have been an endless source of inspiration for me these last 18 months. It’s not about how many times we fall, it’s about how many times we pick ourselves back up and keep going. You do this, Kathy. You have got this.
xoxo nancy
Thank you so much Nancy – not just for these great inspiring words and support but for all your great posts!
While I don’t feel especially brave, really more like a failure, your blog voice is always in the back of head cheering me on!
I am so looking forward to being able to hike with you one day!
Failure? NO. Failing would be giving up. You are fighting for it. That makes you a winner.
I wish you could see yourself the way that all your supporters see you: as a warrior who is fighting her best life.
p.s. Bonus points for sharing a pic of grumpy cat. It’s been way too long since your last pics! 🙂
Isn’t my Nugget a cutie pie! He just makes me smile all the time!
Thank you!
He is THE BEST!!
He was trying to steal some turkey sandwich when I caught this picture of him -> begging/attempting to use his kitty Jedi Mind trick on Aaron. It totally worked he got pieces of turkey for his efforts.
That is tough and definitely very frustrating, I am sure! Hang in there! Re-think your goals and lay them out in small accomplishable steps 🙂 At least, that is something that helps me.
Thank you Lilly Sue, that is great Advice!
You’ve got this 🙂
Also, thought I’d pass this article along:
http://www.gretchenrubin.com/happiness_project/2012/10/back-by-popular-demand-are-you-an-abstainer-or-a-moderator/
It was definitely an interesting read for me!
I’m going through a similar phase. It’s crazy how one small change can have a large effect. You’re going for lifestyle changes and that will take time and there’s going to be ups and downs. Given what you’ve already done, you should feel confident you can get back in the groove again. Perhaps look for something that was tedious in your process before and try to make it more interesting or more fun–even if it slows down the positive results as it is more likely to stick with you long term. Best of luck!
Kyle I read you bagging resume and I thought this is what I need to do! You are you right i need to be more creative and find a good groove! LOVE YOUR BLOG!